Positively Midlife Podcast

Setting Intentions: A Midlife Guide to a Thriving 2024 - Ep. 83

Tish & Ellen Season 3 Episode 83

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Embark on a journey of self-discovery and meaningful connections with us as we ring in the year 2024 and kick off season 3 of the podcast with our INTENTIONS episode! This episode is your personal guide to setting intentions in six key areas that transform the way you navigate through midlife.  

The six key areas are: Personal Growth, Seizing Opportunities, Overcoming Fear, Building Connections, Enhancing Well-being and Embracing Change.  Tish and Ellen roll up their sleeves rolling up their sleeves and share how they will put the six intentions to work in 2024 from Ellen learning  Spanish, and Tish is dusting off her pottery wheel to reconnect with her artistic roots. 

As you tune in, you'll find inspiration to deepen bonds and enhance your well-being in ways that echo comfort and familiarity.   Tish shares a heartwarming story of how rekindling a connection with her mother's friend has brought her closer to cherished memories. We also talk about the wonders of yoga, the fun of pickleball, and the serenity that comes from curling up with a good book to underscore the many facets of well-being.  

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Ellen:

Happy New Year everyone. We're so thrilled to be here with you as we Kickstart 2024 with what we're calling a powerful intention setting episode. And this episode also kick starts us into the 3 of our podcast.

Tish:

That's right, ellen. And today, with this, we are diving deep into six intentions that can transform the way we approach this new year.

Ellen:

Because we're both not about resolutions. You know that, tish. We've talked about this time and time again. We've gone with intentions and just to level set an intention must include not just destination, like a resolution I want to lose weight, I want to learn Spanish but include how we get there.

Tish:

I like the idea of intentions over resolutions Because to me, resolutions are so hard and fast. These kind of goals right, you either achieve them or you break them, while intentions, to me, are just so much broader and speak to the actions that we need to take. Intentions are more of like a roadmap for us.

Ellen:

I like how you said that, Tish. I agree. I like a roadmap. So I'm really looking forward to us sharing six areas of intentions for really anyone in 2024, but specifically our midlifers. But you know, Tish, I love this part of our show and we haven't done this in a few weeks. Let's get to our first obsessions of 2024. What do you got for me?

Tish:

Well, I thought a really great way of starting off the new year is kind of with a new journal, right, mm-hmm? And I found this mantra journal, mantra gratitude journal oh, it has it's a daily gratitude as well as weekly reflections and goals. And what I loved about this it helps us focus on affirmations, self-affirmations, reflecting on like, what went well today and what we plan on what could make tomorrow better. I just like the way that it flows with very positive reinforcements about now and our plan for the future. It also, in the weekly reflections portion, it talks about whether, say, if one of your goals is working out, you can track how many days did you make that happen? So you can pick and choose and then kind of see very visually how you're meeting your personal intentions.

Ellen:

So have you started using the mantra gratitude journal, or is this something you're kicking off here in 2024?

Tish:

This is how I want to kick off 2024.

Ellen:

Awesome. That sounds like a great great tool for our listeners.

Tish:

Awesome. So, Ellen, what about you? What is something that you're obsessed with right now?

Ellen:

Well, I was going to talk about something else, but I have to say after my trip back east my friend Kimberly gave me the best piece of candy I had all holiday season.

Tish:

Oh, I need to hear about this.

Ellen:

I mean I just have to say, all intentions aside, you have to know about the Mojeska and I know that's a weird name, I had to ask it like 10 different times these are candies from Louisville, Kentucky, and they are hand-dipped carmels that you are dipped around a marshmallow. And these candies date back to the 1800s when an opera singer and actress named Helen Mojeska came to Louisville and wowed a candy maker and he created this candy for her. I've got to tell you my friend Kim, she gave me about five of them for the plane ride home and I was like, oh, I'll never eat them. Every single one of them was gone before.

Tish:

I got back to my house. I love it.

Ellen:

Take a look, they are little pieces of heaven is all I can say.

Tish:

I love when you find those regional treats that are very specific to an area. I know in the area that I grew up there was a special candy called sponge candy. It's really only made in the Buffalo area. So I love those regional candies that are quite special.

Ellen:

Yeah, so we'll put a link. There's a few. I know I've had sponge candy. It's like the maple candy you get in Vermont. These regional candies are so special so we'll put a link to both the Montregratitude Journal and the Mojeska in our show notes. So let's get to the first episode of season three, tish. Let's start with our intentions. So intention number one is personal growth, and I really like this idea of saying yes to new experiences. It's like giving ourselves permission to grow and to learn, so stepping out of our comfort zone and bracing opportunities to learn and adapt and change Absolutely.

Tish:

Ellen, it is those moments of trying something new that often lead to the most profound personal development. Whether it's picking up a new hobby or simply saying yes to unfamiliar experiences, it all contributes to our growth.

Ellen:

You know. So, tish, I want you to share with our listeners, if you can, and with me, what your personal growth intention is for 2024, and why Do you have one?

Tish:

You know I usually pick very physical pursuits right, but this year I want to get more back in touch with my creative side and I'm planning on taking up pottery classes again. And so friend of mine and I were talking about it right before the holidays and we used to do hand-built clay and pottery will clay together and we talked about starting it again because we had loved it so much. And there's just something about creating pieces out of clay, whether it's on a wheel or hand-built. That just so exciting to me.

Ellen:

You know, I never even knew that you did pottery before, so I'm learning about you, if you can believe that All these years that's really fun. I'm excited for you. And it's true, you usually do physical pursuits, so this one will be a really great kind of change to your arty side, to your creative side. I'm excited for you.

Tish:

Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. What about you?

Ellen:

All right. Well, my personal growth in Kenchin is to get back to learning Spanish, and you know, I lived in Madrid during our junior year in college and now I tried to learn Spanish back then and I work for a European company right now, a subsidiary where everyone speaks multiple languages perfectly. People are speaking German and English and French. It just makes me want to be someone who can speak more than one language, and so it really reignited this idea of getting back to learning and perfecting my Spanish. So I started by downloading this app called Babble and 15 minutes a day for three months. I've committed to that, so I'm really excited, and the other thing I love about doing it with an app like Babble is that I can start small. You know I'm not committed to going to a class and two, three times a week in homework, and so can I say hello, atomic, tiny habit here, 15 minutes a day.

Tish:

I love that. Now, what does something like that cost?

Ellen:

Yeah, I mean, I think that's a great question. It was, I think, about $7.50 a month if you sign up for a longer period of time and about $12 a month if you sign up for a short period of time. So, hey, heck, it's like some people just give up your latte, right? You're latte a couple of times a week and you've covered the cost of Babble.

Tish:

Yeah, I like that. That sounds really good. Now, is that really for someone who's relearning a language, or can anyone do that?

Ellen:

You know they have it right from the very get-go and I've heard great things about it. So you can be like me, somebody who can, you know, talk a little bit, understand a little bit more, who's very rusty, or you can be a first-timer. So I will report back in how about that in three months in Spanish.

Tish:

I know. No, we're going to hold you to that one.

Ellen:

All right. Well, speaking of us saying yes in 2024, intention number two is all about seizing opportunities and, as we've said, sometimes the best things can begin with just a single yes. Those can be unexpected and rewarding paths and, as we know, it can be creative and innovative.

Tish:

You know, isn't it like that quote? You know, opportunity doesn't knock. It presents itself when you beat the door down. We have the power to create opportunities by saying yes to new adventures and challenges.

Ellen:

You know, Tish, I think you and I are both really open to seizing opportunities and saying yes. So I don't think you and I need a whole heck of a lot of practice in 2024, but I think we need to continue to be open to it. What about you?

Tish:

Yes, I think one of the new things that I want to explore in this new year is I want to start to seek out opportunities to do public speaking about women's empowerment. I just feel so passionate. You know through our podcast that I want to have an impact about how women feel about themselves and how they see especially aging right. Yeah, we get so much negative in the world and we get so much negative messaging about getting older. You know about changes and stuff in our life and I want to expand our positive message that we give on our podcast and I want to get out there in other venues as well.

Ellen:

I love that, bravo. I really look forward to you doing that in 2024. And you know what? What is all about embracing new opportunities. So let's report back in, maybe in six months, on how you're doing on that one.

Tish:

Okay, now let's go right into it. I want to tackle intention number three, and this one we're calling overcoming fear. You know, saying yes to new things can be very intimidating, but it's through these experiences that we learn, that we can build resilience and conquer our fears.

Ellen:

You know, tish, that's so true, especially here at Midlife. For me, stepping out of my comfort zone has allowed me to develop a more adventurous mindset and you know, I think that can happen for anyone, and a lot of times what initially scares us can end up being the most rewarding experience. What do you think you want to do here in 2024,? Tish, to overcome fear.

Tish:

I think the biggest fear that I've been facing lately is about getting sick. You know I've had some health issues, some serious medical conditions, so my intention for 2024 is about continuing my health journey and focusing on a healthy meal prep and building my core strength. I really believe that those two things are really the next course of my health journey.

Ellen:

I love that, you know. I do recall we kicked off the year last year with kind of those 12 things every woman at midlife should do around health, and I know you worked really hard on all 12 of those. So I agree that this is probably a great place for you to focus for intention number three, yeah, yeah, and again, I know that core strength you've talked about too, around surfing Another thing that's really one of the things you'd like to build up and doing.

Tish:

That was one of my goals and I have not. I have not conquered that goal yet, but I think you know, again, with some of my health struggles, you know, it's it's kind of held me back in a few areas and I think that's the fear, right. I think a lot of people, as we get older, we just feel more vulnerable, right, and how do we counteract that? And I really do think it's pursuing health and making sure that our bodies are as strong as they can be.

Ellen:

You know, I agree with you wholeheartedly on this one. And I'm going to add for me, I have a lot of fears around aging, not in how I look per se, but having to have somebody help me. You know, not being able to bend over and pick something up my flexibility, that type of thing. So I would say that this is probably one of the key areas for many of us in in midlife, and I am going to say I did conquer some fears in 2023. I overcame swimming and snorkeling. These are kind of silly snorkeling.

Ellen:

I was there for that one, you were there swimming with stingrays, right, and I think for me, I'd like to break some of the fears I've carried for years. Right, these aren't new fears. I've been afraid of the ocean since I was three and a crab bit me at the Jersey Shore, right.

Tish:

So Were we going to talk about the size of this crab again? I know.

Ellen:

I know the giant, you know 24 inch crab that that bit me. But you know, I I think for me something that I am I don't usually put, push myself physically the way you do in a challenge, and I'm going to say I never really got to the swing dancing. Last year I went, you know, it was like a dabble, a dabble, and I'm, I'm afraid, I am very much afraid of my two left feet and being the worst one in the class or having no one to dance with, or having sweaty palms. I mean, you name it, I'm, I've got a lot of fear.

Ellen:

And so I'm actually going to say I'm going to put myself out there again around dancing and specifically swing dancing, something I've always wanted to do and really, I have to say I have a lot of fears.

Tish:

I'm so proud of you for wanting to do that. You know it's so easy just to just say, oh, there's just something I don't want to. You know, to kind of back puddle and say you don't want to do something because of fear. But when you move forward, just like you did with the stingrays and just like you did with snorkeling with the what kind of fish were they?

Ellen:

The tarpons, the giant tarpons.

Tish:

Yes, right, and but you faced both of those and you embraced the moment and what you were doing, and you did it in a safe, not crazy way, and it's empowering when we face our fears.

Ellen:

Yeah, I did feel empowered by it. I have to say that fear of the ocean has been really with me forever and I mean, gosh, that ocean is clear, like you can see your toes right, I mean.

Ellen:

I really did not need to be so afraid there, but I think really at midlife, taking kind of almost like an accounting of what some of those things are and really looking at why and how could be good for all of us. So I think what we're going to say, we're going to check in on your core strength and your meal prep and your healthy journey and my dancing in about six months. All right, let's move on to yeah, let's move on to intention number four. This is building connections, and I think this one is so important at midlife. You know, you and I have talked about this research about loneliness and friendships throughout the podcast and how important this is. So embracing new experiences, new people, opening doors to meet people who aren't like you, diverse folks, fostering deeper connections and expanding our support networks is so critical to midlife women.

Tish:

You know, it's incredible how trying new things can introduce us to people we may not have cross paths with otherwise. Right yeah, these connections enrich our lives and offer different perspectives that continue our own personal growth.

Ellen:

I know I brought this up last year, but I really would like to not make this intention around maybe meeting people through new experiences as much as it is building and fostering deeper connections with people who are already in my orbit that I may have not been able to keep in touch with or keep up with in 2024. And I think I need to have an intentional plan around this tish like contacting someone new every week, right, that old friends that you're like, oh, I, just I haven't had time to catch up with them. I think if I don't have an intentional plan to do this, it won't happen. So this is a big one for me.

Tish:

I love the intention of reconnecting with old friends and I might just need to piggyback on the intention too. In fact, I know exactly where I plan on starting, because right before the holidays I got a call from one of my mom's best friends. Her name was Anne, oh, so nice. Yeah, she had moved away and I know my mom had kept in touch with her, but and then I would hear from her every now and again and she reached out to me and we played a little phone tag back and forth. But I am committed here into this new year for her to be the one that I reach out to first, because I want, I do wanna, make that connection with her, that reconnection with her, and I've talked about this before when I connect with my mom's old friends it just makes me feel so much closer to her.

Ellen:

Tish, that's beautiful, and I'm so happy to hear that. I mean listen between our kids, our jobs, our lives, the day-to-day management of this, keeping up with our health, these are the kinds of things that can sometimes just fall off our to-do list, and I think by us intentionally making this part of our 2024 plans, we can both do this, and I, too, have really some folks I'm dying to reconnect with. So how did it feel when you talked to Anne?

Tish:

We've been playing phone tag and so I'm sure that I get with her here at the beginning of this year. You know, going down with the flu there we're at the holidays kind of puts that definitely on hold for me. But it was just so nice to hear her voice and I know now that I'm feeling better and stronger I thought, oh, I need to give her that call back because I do wanna make that connection with her and I do wanna stay in touch with her. And there's a list of people like that in my life that we can't talk to them every week but to think, oh, one or two people a month, who am I gonna reach out to Just to say, hey, I'm thinking about you.

Ellen:

I have to share with you and our listeners that I called our college friend, linda Durand right before the holidays because she had had a couple of losses in her life and I hadn't sent a card. It's like sometimes we just get too busy. I didn't want it to get too far past and I got her message. Her message, I left a message and she sent me the kindest thing, linda, if you're listening, it was so kind. She just said hearing your voice made me smile and thanks for connecting. And so I just have to say these things can just be so meaningful and so fruitful to us and again, it doesn't have to be every day, it can just be one a month, right, it just can be one a month. So I think that this building connections is a really good intention for us this year. Tish.

Tish:

Yes, especially at mid-life. But moving on, I wanna talk about number five, and we're calling this one Enhancing Well-Being, Trying new activities and embracing change that can lead to increased fulfillment, reduced stress and a greater sense of purpose.

Ellen:

Oh, absolutely Tish. This one is so important and when we spoke to Lois and Ashley about well-being around the holidays, they had so many great things for us to do and activities and I think just really digging into this area can bring so much joy and fulfillment to us at mid-life Like for me continuing to do yoga, which has a big meditation piece to it that can enhance both my mental and physical well-being.

Tish:

You know, I am really kind of focused for me on February. Once I am post-surgery, I'm ready to get back into playing pickleball, because I've missed it so and I've missed the friends that I've made around playing, and so I've had to give myself a little grace and a little time of healing. But I know that my intention is that this year it's coming back to my life.

Ellen:

I hope so, because I have never seen you happier than when you were pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle. As our friend Kristen said, you were pickling every day, practically so happy and so, I think, just energetic. I mean that your pickleball gave you massive amounts of energy.

Tish:

Yes, and so I think my intention of making that a priority in this new year is going to really lead to what that intention number five enhancing my well-being.

Ellen:

Amazing. So many ways at midlife to do that, to enhance the well-being I mean. I don't even think it needs to be physical, it could just be something like meditation or reading right. I think what I've really come to know is that there are many ways to kind of fill your cup right and around well-being. All right, I know that we have intention number six, and this one is a really big one. As I get older, tish, this is embracing change and saying yes to new things, which really fosters adaptability and resilience and essential it's an essential quality, I think, for getting older, for really navigating the world that's changing, you know, at the speed of sound.

Tish:

Change is inevitable and we all know that. And when we learn to embrace it rather than resist it, we open ourselves to these endless possibilities, and I think 2024 is a great year to start saying yes to more things right. Instead of hesitating and keeping yourself in the mindset of caution, I think we need to keep ourselves in the mindset of saying yes to these new things. Remember that movie, the yes man?

Ellen:

Who was in that movie? Was that Jim Carrey? I can't remember.

Tish:

Yes, it was Jim Carrey, and he changes his whole life by just saying yes, yes, which leads him into crazy situations, but it was his way of just saying yes to everything. He changed really the whole dynamics of his life.

Ellen:

I'm gonna have to re-watch that movie, but I noticed for me this area is getting harder and harder. I'm gonna just make a sound. That's me trying to go with the flow or embracing change. So I know this is an area I really need to be aware of being open to change big and small. Right, it doesn't have to be something big. It could be somebody saying I don't wanna see that movie, or let's eat here instead of there, or go out Friday versus Saturday, or it could be a big change like a friend's moving away and feeling sad about it. So, mid-lifers, as we embark on 2024, let's consider all six of these intentions and saying yes to new experiences. I think is one of the most important here To see these opportunity, overcome your fears, build connections, enhance wellbeing and, above all, I would say for me, tish. I think I'm gonna say the number one intention for me is embracing change. What about you?

Tish:

I think probably for me it's going to be enhancing wellbeing. I think that one's gonna be a big one for me, right Just from how I ended this last year. But I just wanna thank all of our listeners for tuning in to the Positively Midlife podcast. We hope that our intentions inspire you to create or push your own intentions. Our intention as a podcast is to share more inspiring topics, more inspiring stories and insights with you on the season number three for us Can't believe it and throughout, I know and throughout 2024. And we want to know what is interesting to you. What do you wanna hear about in this new year? We'd love to hear some of your ideas. Please reach out to us on our website and let us know maybe a guess that you'd love for us to interview. We'd love to hear from you in this new year and that is our intention is to also have more interaction with our listeners.

Ellen:

So true, absolutely In 2024, we wanna hear from you more. So remember it's never too late to create a great midlife. All right, happy new year, happy 2024,. Everyone Till next week, midlife first.

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